So it has come to this for Channel 31's "Good Day Sacramento":
Two of the featured stories this morning were Mark S. Allen leaning back and seeing how long he could balance on two legs of a chair, and Tina Macuha stacking pancakes for no apparent reason.
Boy, wouldn't you love to sit in on a "Good Day" story planning meeting? ....
Executive producer: "OK, what cheap stunts do ya got for me today?"
Producer 1: "How about if we get Stefanie Cruz to crush grapes in a short dress and bare feet?"
Executive producer: "C'mon, that was Tuesday's show. We need something fresh."
Producer 2: "Well, we could send Doug Brauner up in a small aircraft with no training and watch him fly it."
Executive producer: "It's been done. People, people - let's get some forward thinking. Surely there are stupid TV tricks we haven't done yet."
Producer 3: "Brainstorm! We see how long Mark can teeter on a chair. Now there's must-see TV. And how about Tina seeing how high she can stack pancakes?"
Executive producer: "Brilliant! Anything else?"
Producer 1: "We could spike Marianne McClary's coffee cup with diesel fuel and see if she notices."
Executive producer: "Great, but let's save that for the November sweeps."
Yes, yes, this is an imagined conversation, but the grape-crushing and the airplane-flying scenarios really did take place this week. In fairness to "Good Day" (and sometimes we do try to be fair), it does have five hours to fill, five days a week.
They won't have to worry about killing time Friday, though. Dr. Phil is going to be in the studio, plugging his show, which airs on channels 13 and 31.
The "Good Day" staff will be taking him on the road with an appearance at the Galleria at Roseville at 11 a.m. and the Downtown Plaza at 2 p.m.
No word yet on whether they are going to make Phil lean back in his chair to break Allen's record.